Here is a small teaser for my post-modern science
fiction. The story demands a lot from the reader. Anyone can read and have fun.
But the story is an ocean. You can enjoy it, but you wouldn’t know the true
depth of it unless you put yourself into work and take a deep dive into the
massive ocean. The ones who can savor the story to the fullest are the people
who are “in the know”. If you start off
from scratch, it’ll take piles of books and hours of videos and massive amounts
of self-exploration to just understand the full extent of these 4.3K words of opening.
It’s kind of like TTGL. You see one thing, but when you dive in with your
wisdom you find something X10 deeper. Keep diving. The more research you do
more things you understand.
I’ll put some extras to deal with the long post. Enjoy
to the fullest. Experience and evolve.
Early 21st century
Now I can patch things up with my life. I feel like I finally
got a hang of the longest surreal movie of all time. It’s titled “My Life”. I
look at my past like a man looking at the dream he had last night. I can only
salvage few things. I think I’m a German. I remember Hitler. I remember him to
be closely inspecting me. Before that, I see an old house and a little me. Then
a crash…… not from this world. I remember reality going AWOL. Every sense was
in a constant dynamic state. If my reality was a pond, the UFO was a huge rock
that fell on it.
I
don’t even know how I lived the rest of my life. Until last week I could only
remember the previous 15-16 hours. But somehow I had lived like an android who
doesn’t even know what it’s doing even when it’s doing things perfectly well.
I
don’t know whether it’s right to call it a UFO. But it was definitely not
something known to the public. My body seems to rejuvenate really fast.
Yesterday I cut my finger really bad and it’s already healed. So I’m healing
4-5 times faster too. Even though I still look young, I might have actually
seen Hitler.
2008
For the past year I’ve been trying to figure out something that
is haunting me. Certain stimulation always comes and I always feel like it’s
too much cognitive load. It’s completely indescribable by words or I thought it
is. It’s impossible teach a blind man what “White” is. But if you try hard
enough, you can manage to do it using indirect ways. It’s hard as dealing with
deaf+blind people. It’s a major pain. But it could pay off well.
2008-June
After 3 months I can finally figure out what’s haunting me. It’s
forbidden knowledge directly stored in my brain. I don’t know how I’m going to
make other people understand this. I just see the world differently. What I
know is what I know. What I need to know is how to teach it to others. If I’m
right, it’s time for us to stop being human. On a blog called slickr-flikr I
found this word called Engkami. It was created by a person named lotus. “Eng”
stands for engineering and “kami” is what Japs use to call God. This Engkami……
today, I decided it to be my destiny.
2008-25th June (Dawn)
It’s
been a week. Now I’m perfectly sure about what I have to……what I’m going to do.
Let me get things slowly. I don’t remember the exact words. But Tesla said
something like “If you want to discover the secrets of the universe, think of
it in terms of Energy, Frequency and Vibration.” I dug deeper. The lead was
true. In fact too true. My own haunting memories which aren’t even mine kept
whispering to me that Tesla was right. The further I go the simpler things got.
Now I even believe that Tesla had a theory of everything. A theory that is so
simple that we would overlook in the very attempt in the search for it. Fermat
said that his “Last Theorem” has a simple proof. We don’t have it. Maybe we are
looking too far. The infinitely far away could be infinitely close.
2008-25th June 1600h
I
again ran through the QM notes. The Copenhagen interpretation was complete
bullshit aka scientifically untenable. I found the Quantum Information Theory
to be the most sensible and non-counterintuitive one. I had to expand it using
the data in my own head. I didn’t know all the theories to come. But I knew the
facts. So I made a story based on my facts just like Newton did with gravity
and Einstein with space-time.
If
we interpret reality using only Energy, Frequency and Vibrations, things get really
simple, except for calculations. What we see is just waves. What we hear is
just waves. If we can reduce whole reality into waves for the sake of
interpretation, we can engineer ourselves to expand our sensory range and give
us clairvoyance and many more.
That’s
what was haunting me for over half a century. I don’t even know how I lived,
all because of this. Now I’m gonna
live, all for this.
2008-25th June 08:14:57 PM
Okay.
This is how I’m going to present it to them. We should be able to interpret the
whole reality using wave functions. Perception is what collapses the wave. You
may have heard the multiverse theory to be possible though it is highly
complicated. But I say multiverse is absolutely impossible. Each individual is
the observer of his/her own reality. Therefor all wave functions are collapsed
and one specific state is observed. There is no other you living as a superstar
unless you observe yourself to be. I know this could be a lot to swallow. Just
think of these as possibilities and let’s get more pragmatic.
I’ll
give you a worthy thing to invest on. Take the thing you hear. It’s between
20Hz – 20 KHz and then there are modes of communication of our civilization in
MHz, GHz, THz…… you get the idea. Visual feed to the brain, the auditory feed,
these things are like extensions. Binary data comes in different extensions
like .txt, .mp3, .mp4, .pdf, .mkv, .png and the data we gather from the reality
comes as images, sounds, smell, taste, pressure and etc. We can reduce all
these into waves as we can reduce all digital information into “1”s and “0”s.
What
I present you is an expansion of the sensory range. Sending electrical signals
to the brain for the mind to interpret reality is an outdated and inefficient
system. We have to take a more direct approach. If we can enhance our brain to
be responsive for a wider range of waves, we will be able to see all the info in the net without
computers. Every single person’s personal info can be known just by looking; I
mean just focusing. Pineal gland and parts of our right brain are usable for
these things. But we are not using 90% of our brains. There is a possibility
that we might be using even less than the rumored 10%.
I’ve
heard that God created man in his image so that the man can someday become God.
We are God. God is a locked function
of Homos; I mean sapiens. I have some of
the keys. So anyone interested? I mean at
least you’d get 100 times better spies.
[Deeply exhales]
Wow!...
That should make them interested. This is just the beginning of my destiny. I
should get some good night’s sleep before the day of Judgment.
The following day
Today
was a great damned day of importance. I was entitled…… as a daydreamer, a
postmodern hippie, a kid trying to prove fantasies in eastern books. They
called me an Indian nutjob. Shouldn’t I be a German?......Well I’ve got bigger
worries like: “What would happen to my destiny?”
Everything
happens for a reason…right? RIGHT! Those people even understood the stuff I
said. This is America. Don’t they need secret high tech!? No… it’s not that.
They just don’t want their illusions to be destroyed. They don’t want to see
the world like a God because it is different from what they see as humans!
That’s
when it kicked in. When people confront something that goes against their
ideals and beliefs, the brain reacts in the same way it responds to a threat
for its survival. Then the rationality is lost and the lizard brain takes over.
The shape shifting Lizard people taking over the nations turned out to be true;
in an allegorical sense.
I
had overlooked the human factor. I thought if I had right points, they would
understand. But when their understanding tends to transform their image about
the world, they just flush away the rationality. People want to go down the
ladder; not up.
I
saw this in a video. There is a point in the middle of your ribcage, near your
heart. When that spot is stimulated, everyone gets weak. There is another spot
in the top of your head which does the reverse. Basically it’s the 4th
and 7th chakra pools. This day I felt a great stimulation around the
4th pool. I was so stricken that it transcended my capacity to
express it. Therefore the tear didn’t come out even when I begged them to.
The
sun was being hidden below the skyscrapers and with the emergence of darkness
which is a different way of expressing the departure of light… came the
haunting. Did I ever have a theory about phantoms? Guess they came into my
range of perception. I held my head and fell on my knees in the middle of
Central Park beside the dying sun. Rainbow colored flashes resonated through my
head. I felt myself being strangled. Not physically but metaphysically, or
should I say out of the common range…
I
was in a different world all so real and vibrant. It was more like a Final
Fantasy setting though it felt realer than anything ever known. I’ve talked
with a blind girl. She said she always feel something missing in her life and
said that she feels her life to be less real than what people claims it to be.
I think……no, I feel that it’s safe to say that the degree of realism depends on
the amount of intrication.
The
world I saw was detailed as detailed can be. I could see everything. If a person with 3D vision looks at a 2D maze, all
will be clear and simple. No room for secrets. This was such a world without
not just privacy but also mystery. I was witnessing the true splendor of
reality. I saw speeches, heard pictures, tasted the smell, talked to the bees
and my head went AWOL. I couldn’t feel anything above my neck. But my
observations didn’t change. I knew my brain was swelling and lightning was
going through my nerves. But it was like watching your game avatar’s stamina go
down. It was highly intricate, yet didn’t felt to be mine.
I
knew all this is pushing my brain to its limits. But my mind had being yearning
for this. This is like losing virginity. I was stretching the restrictions of
my brains user availability. Experiencing the pain, I realized one thing about
my destiny. I learned that is must be
hell a lot more enjoyable than first time sex.
I
felt that my body came to its limits. My heart was pumping blood like crazy. I
was sweating. But the sensory stimulations kept coming. None of the body’s
problems felt like my concerns. But suddenly a great pain was felt on my pineal
gland as if it was about to explode. This time, I felt it as mine. I was stuck
with fear. The Phantoms became clearer.
With
a prolonged continuous and looped “om” sounds, things got less intricate almost
like the wave functions were becoming stationary. Then there was a spontaneous
action of me being the cynosure. Everybody was looking at me in their static
postures. The world felt abandoned. I had a glimpse of me kneeling in the
middle of a (the) park. Then I was looking at me. I was looking at “me” in this
realer world and it was in 4D. I saw all of me as if I’m not me; but god. Yet
it all felt to be me.
No
info came out of the people of the world. There was no need for such
communication. Their static expression said it all - “You made it all go
hidden”. I felt an inability to be responsible. I felt that I had lost their Raison
d'être which was in my hands.
The
world shattered in all its glory. It was a real marvel to see. A helicopter
came crashing down at me. I dodged its tail which came 4 feet over the ground
by leaning backwards. Some parts from the explosion only missed me by 2cm. I
was in great fear and also great power watching the marvel of a crumbling
splendor.
The
world was overflown in war. Don’t ask me when. It’s just a shift in perception;
a different state of the collapse of the wave function of infinite reality.
Still my vision was in 4D: A lot different from the average dream. I felt the
need to run the rainbow Phantoms kept coming; kept haunting. It was one hell of
a war though it was so heavenly. It felt so real to watch and so unreal to not
get hurt. I should get killed 10 times per minute. Yet it only happened like
once a minute and every single time I get saved by a hair’s distance.
The
pattern was broken when a phantom closed in and said BOOOO! Kind of lame, but
it sent chills up and down through my spine. A 50ft. tall blue and white mech
hit the floor activating its AG-shields and I went bouncing and hit a destroyed
white and red tank with my legs up and head down. I took time to take a single
deep breath >> Realized that there is no sun in this vibrant world. The
world had its volume turned down. I could almost see Quanta… like bubbles. It’s
like what you see at the bottom of a waterfall. I felt something being taken
away. I didn’t like the enlightenment that was coming at me. I mean bubbles!!??
I felt like I would lose all the beliefs I acquired through all my life. Using
waves for interpretation is one thing. But this is outright ridiculous. I can
almost see Quanta. But it’s all too horrific. Why does it have to be so simple!
No. Nonono!!
A
Phantom came and I was dragged to the upper echelons of reality; or should I
say lower? I don’t know anymore. All I know is what is comfortable. I got up
and ran…ran… and ran. The scenery: always kept changing. The Phantoms: always
kept chasing. The situation was most desperate. Then it hit my head. I don’t
need to follow all those games, all those movies…and TV shows. I decided to be
the master my power requires. I took courage – I became courage. I stood up and
went from defense to counter.
When
the Phantoms get close I get more threats for survival. Phantoms never touched
me. They avoided it at all cost even though they were all about closing on me. I
had no clear reason to be afraid of them. Yet I always feared to confront them.
Me and the Phantoms were like playing a single player arm-wrestling match.
Let me ask “what are our dreams?” How or most
importantly, why we react to them? Aren’t they just illusions…… just
interpretations of the conscious.
While
I was getting semi-enlightenedly rhetorical, I was also going Deus Ex. I didn’t
know the high-tech weaponry. I’ve never known combat. But what do I know about
me. What do I know about reality. What proof do I have to say that the reality
is existent; other than my thought that it exists. Do the Phantoms exist beyond my thought of them
being existent. People get scared by nightmares because they perceive them to
be real…… right? Let’s just say five kinds of sensory receptions are perceived
by the conscious. How can the conscious know that it perceived data without
perceiving the act of perception. Is this…… backdoor to hack reality. When I’m
dreaming… do I hack my own perception to accomplish my desires!... DO I? Is
that why there is an eternal equilibrium between the violation of my ghost and
the haunting of the omni-colored Phantoms?
While
I was in my enlightening agony I killed 7 soldiers out in the open in just 2
secs in Max Payne style and made my finishing move banging a helicopter with
the last remaining ammo of the ZPEM-Shocker I had. A great way to finish off high-Ex
loaded weapons at close range. The quantum state of the targeted range gets
shaken and things re-collapse into a different state of the wave function. All
programs get scrambled and humans just pass away due to their inability to
co-operate with the sudden shift of the “state”. Should be something like suddenly waking from a
dream because your dream avatar was struck by lightning.
I
exhaled deeply as the helicopter fell down and the 27 story building’s bottom 4
floors got wiped out by the explosives I set earlier. I couldn’t recall any
other kills before that. It was like they were out of the cache memory. I don’t
even know how I did all this even being pre occupied with my own psycho-journey
filled with rhetorical questions. It’s beyond human. But… what is human? I don’t even know about what I
know. But I don’t really think I know about next millennium tech.
On
the top of that, nothing felt my own…or at least it wasn’t what I was used to
be felt when things were mine. By “things” I mean my whole life + everything
related. My vision was 4 dimensional. I was the God and the Eve. I know that
whoever is kneeling on the Central Park is feeling a continuous pain of 30-35 Del
right in the brain. So the pain has been reduced. But in the top of that, it
didn’t concern me much. It was merely an observation; a vague one. The “Me” in
this realer world was also the same. I’m just observing it. I live it. But I
feel like I’m a lot more than my eyes, hair, lips, skills, neurons, memories,
ideologies, money, weapons, status or whatever.
I
got a little bit dizzy. That’s when 5 samurai like soldiers entered the show. I
knew that the Phantoms were guiding them. I also know that I needed a break
from my journey of enlightenment. I needed an escape and here came a deadly
one. I don’t know whether they are human soldiers in suites, cyborgs, bioroids
or semi-biological AIs. There is no difference. All the kinds follows the same
program; the same mechanical agony. Well they had their 5 unique styles and
different usages of diamond black, ruby and platinum colors along with
different types of blades and hand mounted crossbows.
I
focused myself on the battle.it felt like all my pains were flushed away. Maybe
I stopped being receptive for the pains. I knew all their moves, strategies,
skills, openings and weaknesses. I could basically see it all just by looking.
I felt such a pity towards all soldiers. They were just easily figure outable
lame sets of algorithms. These guys were as badass as Metal Gear Rising
characters. But their whole existence was simply understandable like life of an
amoeba. I knew their moves before they even make their moves. Dodging a chain
of combos from all 5 of them at once was simple. I just had to be careful.
I
was spectacular to watch. I used one of their punches to shoot myself into the air
and used a soldier on air as footing to jump higher and shoot another samurai
right in the face with a Railgun while dodging his grim reaper scythe which was
being electro charged. Before I fall the 60m I grabbed the scythe which already
had a lot of momentum and sliced off the left arm of the soldier below me.
Whatever it (he) was, it had blood: Red blood. So I guess the NPC has some
human biology in it. It’s a shame to see it being reduced to easily
comprehensive function rather than being more human. I’m a human, right? A
chrysalis of God. Soldiers are just functions like some NPC in a game. A
soldier is a sentience striped off its ability to go through a metamorphosis.
Then it is shouldn’t be eligible to be defined as sentient.
Anyway,
the question I have for myself is “Would I be able to hold on to the end of
this metamorphosis?” Sure I kick ass.
But do I know the basics of kicking ass:-/…?
When
you play a game do you know how to use all the weapons, martial arts and
gadgets? Well, you do know them. But do you know all about them? I don’t think
I’ve learned to use decomposer guns, ZPEMs, Railguns or High Frequency blades.
But I can use them whenever I want. I was curious about that as much as amazed
I was. But when I landed on my feet, I lost it all. I tried to land properly and hurt my legs. I kept my stance with the
scythe. But it did hurt a lot. That’s when I asked myself “where the heck did
you learned to breathe? Who taught you to cry when you come out of the womb?
How did you learn to cry to get your momma’s nipples to suck when you were
hungry?” Then I asked myself “What happens when you try to regulate your
breath?”
I
dodged the katana. But the wave of wind which came out of the slash hurt my
right eye. I felt something. Not fear. Not thrill. Not even relief. It’s what
you feel when you almost touch a speeding car before saving your ass from the
accident. Where did you learn that reaction?!? I hit the samurai in the tummy.
I knew that it is futile against the C-60 armor. I perfectly knew it. Yet I had ignored my own knowledge. Was I
feeling desperate! Well how did I learn to feel
at all? My 4D view started having a smaller range. My life felt more like
what it used to feel to be “mine”. I knew it wasn’t good. I felt like all my
energy and brainpower getting framed, restrained and locked. But I felt
comfortable regardless of the dire situation. I remembered a girl I knew who
kept going after her BDSM crazed lover perfectly knowing that it isn’t good for
body.
I
went back into defending myself. Phantoms made me distracted. I fell down again
and again. I wasn’t ignoring all my pain anymore. Just getting brushed by their
punches was hard enough. Any of the remaining 4 could just smack down a rhino
in a boxing ring (a big one). No…… no way!!
The guy who got his arm ripped off is coming back with his veins sealed.
Wait! What did I said?! “Guy” It is not
a fact. Why did I assume? Am I going down the ladd-maybe it’s all for good. May
be…#
Seeing
him gave me courage and determination. I felt myself being drenched in valor. I
didn’t observe it really. Maybe I created the whole valor thing. How did I even
learn to respond with specific emotions at specific observations? When did I
learn my emotions# I don’t care anymore.
The
wall behind me was destroyed by a tank. The riots came to its climax. An
all-out war had closed in, in every single direction. The marvelous
civilization crumbled around me. I made myself more rigid and hard to make sure
that I wouldn’t crumble. I dodged about 24 combos in a row; some by hair’s
distance (which did more than enough to hurt me) and some by few cm. I made
sure that I wasn’t pushed to the edge. I became harder. Harder than diamond, so
that I can survive all the conflict: so that I can return home. I felt a
feeling of longing for something. It was all vague. I only knew it as much as
what a child would know about her boogieman. But for the sake of my survival, I
shut myself to all the facts I could just see. I dodged hard and I hit hard.
The war broke into my arena and the place became and embodiment of chaos
itself. Amidst the chaos I felt a soft breeze passing through, all unaffected
by the war or my 1 on 4.5 duel. The breeze passed me like nothing was
happening. The strengthless wind was absolutely unaffected by the conflict.
Just
noting this fact shook my mentality. I felt an urgency to be more and more
stringer. I threw all my skills to keep all the 4 and a 0.5 men at bay. I felt
like I would lose all meaning of my existence if I don’t tougher than these
soldiers. It wasn’t because the soldiers were strong but because of the wind
was so weak. I caught a little glimpse of what I’ve really being feeling…as emotions or whatever. We see
stars as shining because of the fluctuations of the atmosphere. All these
things I’ve been feeling are just my perception of me losing my cool; and
becoming an animal. Beasts are the dynamic distortion and God is the static
calm……and I thought of my destiny to be engineering God! [A retrospective LOL]
As my eyes were getting teary, I saw that the
electro charge of my (I mean his…/its) scythe being ready. Why did the all
seeing me wait till I happen to
notice that!? I even approximated the number of combos I dodged. What is hap…
Just F*** all this. I awoke the beast within. Let my insanity break lose and
said “This ends HERE” Along came an earthquake of exactly 9.13 in Richter scale
which gave me the perfect push while kicking off the defense and counter
stances of the soldiers. I just beheaded the one closest to me >> sliced
3 darts and sliced a half a palm of another.
I
felt a sense of accomplishment. The electro charge storms the blade with
electrons and concentrates the electron flow at the edge of the gold-alloy
blade. It’s basically a thin lightning of 100-210 angstroms of width going at
195-205 Mm/s. Armor being harder than diamond is not an problem.
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